WOMEN NEED TO CHANGE OUR BEHAVIOR TO EVOLVE
CHANGE YOUR BEHAVIOR AND INSTANTLY BECOME YOUR POSITIVE SELF, YOUR BEST VERSION, INSTANTLY BECOME THE WOMAN YOU ARE TRULY MEANT TO BE.
Our behavior is key in creating our quality of life. Our behavior is key in creating the relationships we desire. Our behavior reflects our intentions, our beliefs, and our opinions…toward others and toward life. It reflects our beliefs about our self. Our behavior expresses our vibe and tells others if we are confident or insecure, kind or mean, trustworthy or untrustworthy, happy or cranky, smart or unintelligent, open-minded or judgmental, spiritual or egoistic, and so on. And it tells others whether we respect and trust them or not. Women are beginning to understand now that behaving submissively or aggressively undermines our true power and misleads men about who we truly are.
93% OF HOW YOU COMMUNICATE IS WITH YOUR BODY…AND WHAT IT SAYS IS ALWAYS THE TRUTH.
Most especially, our behavior communicates 100% with our self and influences what we are feeling and thinking in any given moment. Our behavior can make us our best or worst version. Many think that behaving positively when we feel negative, like smiling when we are down or being at ease when angry, is inauthentic. Yet the wonderful truth is–our positive behavior helps us reconnect with our authenticity…with our best qualities as a person. We release needless negative self-talk and feel confident. Taking a deep breath, standing tall and smiling, we regain perspective and release feeling like a victim–this is our false, inauthentic self…and we respond rationally, more genuinely and effectively as a result. Gracious, respectful behavior, even when we are feeling somewhat judgmental, helps us create more open interactions…and ultimately we begin to feel less biased. Therefore, rather than faking it, we actually are masterfully using our positive body language to re-awaken to our true self…helping us release fear and open to love and responding to life with greater wisdom.
“…we actually are masterfully using our positive body language to re-awaken to our true, authentic self.” p.kirk
When we behave with grace and integrity, whether alone or with others, we shift negative, fearful thoughts to positive validating beliefs about who we are. The more consistently we practice good body language, these validating vibrations encourage us to believe the Divine Truth–“I am good, I am valuable, I am lovable, I am intelligent, I am capable, I am beautiful, I am creative, I am loving and loved.” And these truths re-grounded in our psyche intrinsically reciprocate and inspire us to behave with integrity, grace, intelligence and wisdom…we are in a positive body/mind cycle and behaving as our sovereign self. We have evolved into our true self.
We are the creators of our life…and we are going to create either as a “victim” or as a “woman in her own power”, as an evolved woman. It is our choice–we can continue to live unconsciously and be at the effect of others and situations which usually manifests in negative behaviors and outcomes…and unhappiness. Or we can learn to be more aware of ourselves and take control of how we behave and create the life we want, a life of ease, respect, love and joy, a meaningful life. We have the power to create a good life–behavior by behavior, interaction by interaction, moment by moment, day by day..
OUR GREATEST SUFFERING IN LIFE IS SELF-HATE. WE BEHAVE AS OUR WORST SELVES AND WE MAKE OURSELVES AND OTHERS MISERABLE.
OUR GREATEST POWER IN LIFE IS SELF-LOVE. WE BEHAVE AS OUR BEST SELVES AND MAKE OURSELVES AND OTHERS HAPPY.
WHAT HAPPENED? AND WHERE WE NEED TO GO NOW.
So we get it–somewhere a long time ago women lost our power, even our “magic.” We relinquished our power because we believe that the masculine is the more valued and thus we try to become like men. And yet, we are mad at men. And to make it more convoluted, though mad because they have dominated us and we feel victimized by them as a result, we also desperately want their validation so we can feel good about ourselves, so we can feel attractive, so we can feel valued–our fathers, brothers, boyfriends, husbands, sons, and bosses. Strange to want the validation of a person that you think has misguided values and treats you poorly. And women try to compete, to dominate in return, so we feel some sense of self-worth…yet we become strident and castrating only weakening our self-esteem more. The relationship between men and women is an extremely unhealthy, dominant-submissive, codependent, utterly dysfunctional one, particularly at work. As a result, we have become confused about who we truly should be and don’t really like ourselves very much…we actually are more mad at ourselves than at men and this has devolved into self-hate–we believe we are not good, valuable, worthy, beautiful, smart enough–and as a result we behave poorly.
We may have a good reason for how we feel and behave because the feminine has been dominated for millennia, yet we can’t control nor change men, we can only control ourselves and how we respond…and playing the victim only makes us more victimized. It only makes us look and feel desperate. Therefore it is time we stop grasping for half the “man-power” in business, politics, and religion because we are sacrificing too much–Our Self. Instead, we need to change our beliefs about ourselves and learn to love who we are…we need to evolve back into our true self. Reconnected with our true self and feeling stronger in who we are, we will regain our authentic power and become emotionally self-reliant. We will genuinely behave as our best selves: we will be the integrity and peace we want to see in the world–that we want to see from men. We will become a formidable force as a result…a strong influence that forges a new kind of power, a new kind of relationship between men and women, and a new definition of success in business that benefits the world.
We will begin to relate to the world from our sovereign self–patient, kind, gracious, authentic, loving, and wise. A woman unto herself is her most powerful self…is her most influential self.
Becoming Authentically Feminine
…and forging new, more positive relationships with men.
Now changing life-long, core beliefs about our selves takes time, even decades—it involves sifting through the rubble of our broken hearts and the debris of our damaged psyches in an effort to connect with our true self and dismantle old, false, negative beliefs. This process requires quite a lot of psychotherapy and spiritual searching. However, what we are learning is that how we behave can have a significant and instant positive influence on our self-esteem. Science and psycho-physiology show us that positive behavior activates positive hormones and neurotransmitters in our body and mind and helps awaken us to the power of our inner self. We awaken to our vibe. Our “vibe” is the unique blend of sacred vibrations of our true self and feeling this yummy, energizing sensation flowing through our body we feel our personal power and self-esteem become stronger. Women begin to reawaken to our divine feminine. Experiencing our feminine vibe more powerfully, we become aware of the qualities that are our feminine self–authenticity, kindness, nurture, compassion, inclusion, softness, tolerance, patience, connection, cooperation, wisdom, creativity, fun, passion, compassion etc. This flow feels good, feels natural, and we regain appreciation of our feminine nature, we regain our “feminine confidence.” We fall in love with our self. We behave well.
Consistently activating SELFLOVE, over time our psyche shifts. We begin to understand that both our feminine and masculine selves are equally vital to the full expression and authenticity of who we are…this is a healthy integration of heart (F) and mind (M). We awaken to how important it is that we do not suppress Her nor over-develop Him any longer. And this is the Key to better relationships with men. Because we have suppressed our feminine in order to fit in at work, we have become unsure of our selves and unskilled at communicating and relating to men. Trying to be men, trying to do things their way, feels unnatural and subconsciously makes us angry/aggressive. We become confused about how we want men to treat us. And of course it makes sense that men become confused about how to relate to us–instead of responding to our feminine which would feel more natural to them, they struggle to relate to us as we are demanding they do, as men. Also, they can sense our underlying strident vibe and feel rather hesitant/afraid. And what also is in play is that men have a feminine side and are empathetic yet are discouraged from showing it…so the business world is powerfully biased to the masculine–one perspective continually leading to an unbalanced work and life experience.
Women want to, and should be, in business if the world is going to reach its full potential. Yet women don’t really want to be men. What we really want is to be valued in our feminine power as much as the world values the masculine. The irony is how can we expect this if we don’t relate to the world as our strong, true feminine self…how does the world know who She really is? It has created quite the mess. As a result, we keep criticizing and making men wrong for not valuing the feminine. And it is important to understand that this not only puts us out of sync with men yet we are also out of sync with our inner selves and waging war both with men and with our inner masculine self. Though in some sense the war may feel valid, winning wars never leads to positive outcomes…there is so much destruction with no hope of authentic relating afterward.
This competitive and confrontational energy is not natural to the feminine. Her focus is connection, collaboration, community. Therefore it is important we stop waging the war within and seek peace…seek understanding and evolve our consciousness about a new way of being… evolve into ” a woman in her power.” As women begin to honor our feminine more, this helps us actually begin to respect our inner masculine–we begin to see the masculine for the power and sacredness that it is rather than some “dominating force” we have to defend against and compete with. We begin to experience a healthy re-integration of our masculine and feminine qualities in our body/mind and regain a sense of wholeness–we begin to understand how our masculine traits serve our feminine, and how our feminine supports our masculine. Centered in our true selves, we own how valuable women are and we begin to see the wonderful complement of women and men. Meaning we don’t look to men to validate us because we take care of that…rather we honor men and are ready to show up in a genuine manner of “true partnership”–respecting and appreciating the other.
Women are interested in evolved relationships and therefore we need to hone our skills and control our ego-arrogance. Evolved relationships require that we give up trying to control and change the other. The old school mentality of thinking that women need to “press in, lean in” to change company cultures, to change the men there, is counter-productive and obsolete. Rather both women and men need to become more interested in understanding who the other is and in collaborating and learning from each other. This requires we express ourselves authentically as well as be genuinely open to each other’s point of view. We need to listen completely and with tolerance and respect…rather than with judgment and criticism and “leaning in”, interrupting, to make a point. If this authenticity results in us complementing each other, then we can create a healthy partnership. If we are not a complement then we depart in peace.
Put in terms of women’s equality at work, we cannot change men or company cultures. We can’t force them to evolve if they don’t want to. We can only change and evolve ourselves and this in itself is hugely powerful and influential. This is how we create the greatest possibility of becoming co-creators in the transformation of companies into higher-consciousness cultures. Now not all cultures want to evolve and thus we need to decide. We can stay at such a company and still be empowered because we stand in our true self regardless of what we face and how we are treated. Or we can seek wise, conscious men who have become aware and accountable for how the masculine has dominated the feminine and who see that the world’s refusal to move beyond the patriarchy as destructive and narrow-minded. They see how closed-minded men have been to the values and virtues of the feminine and thus how this has undermined success and a healthy world. And thus they are champions for the evolution of better business, a better society…champions for a more healthy integration of the feminine and masculine in business, champions for the evolution of both women and men.
MAKING THE TRANSITION–evolving INTO OUR TRUE-SELF
We change who we are by changing our beliefs. We change our beliefs by changing our behavior.
Evolved women know how important it is the feminine is equally present as the masculine in business…we want to make sure that the disparity of wealth becomes more reasonable, that decisions that affect the lives of many are tempered with consideration and not just fueled by greed, that decisions are made to positively affect the Earth despite a squeezing of the bottom line–that the Earth becomes an investment rather than a resource. To this end, evolved women are learning how to be more “calmly committed” to our purpose so that others are not overwhelmed by our sense of righteousness and thus become distracted by our anger rather than inspired by our authenticity. How can they possibly hear what we are saying and learn about the divine feminine, a woman in her power, if we are constantly confronting them and telling them what they are doing wrong? Thus we are learning how to powerfully express our business acumen–our intelligence and logic–honed by our emotional, our creative, considerate, compassionate, and wise spirit. We believe in demonstrating to men how important it is to have an open heart and an open mind at work…to embrace the power of feminine qualities and skills at work for greater success. And part of this means encouraging men to redefine the meaning of success .
Feeling the uplifting energy of positive behaviors, we are embodying our true self…and as a result, our emotions lift and we become wiser, more intelligent about love and work, about life. Feeling the energy of more “feminine-quality” behaviors helps us feel more feminine. As more highly-conscious women, our goal shifts from trying to fight for half of the world’s “man-power—fame, fortune, dominance” to co-creating a different kind of power that creates a better world. We realize denying who we truly are and suppressing our feminine qualities so we can be accepted by men does not interest us any longer…and quite frankly, it tears down social structures and does not serve the world. Most especially, it is time we admit that we don’t want to be accepted as a “man-woman” and accept and take responsibility for the new journey this generates for us now. We want to be accepted and appreciated as a woman so ‘She’ must come out…’She’ must not be compromised, our true feminine needs to be expressed fully and openly so we evolve.”
Practicing positive behavior consistently helps cultivate a strong feminine vibration, and as a result we begin to see the world differently than we have for ages–instead of seeing it from the masculine paradigm which is only half of life-force energy, we are opening to a perspective of viewing life through the lens of “wholeness”–a healthy integration of the feminine and masculine. Thus we begin to see what has true meaning in life and start to change our focus from “getting power” to “being empowered.” And the remarkable benefit is that as we learn to honor and validate our selves this will change our beliefs about others, about men especially. We will begin to see the fabulousness of men and stop trying to change them. We will treat them with respect and this will influence how they treat us…it has to, it is Law. Like vibes attract like vibes…or put another way, like behavior attracts like behavior.
Therefore evolved women are willing to change how we are behaving at work and risk exposing our heartfelt beliefs in business and politics in the face of probable rejection and ridicule. We are not willing to back down yet nor are we willing to “fight back” anymore. Competition and aggression only has the affect of posturing and dividing–getting everyone stuck on opposite sides of the table and the war wages on. Rather, evolved women stand in the peace of our authentic, sacred self…raising our vibe and becoming radiant, becoming powerfully influential women. What this means is we commit to courageously keep looking for ways of collaborating rather than confronting…rather than trying to become men we are instead trying to understand them, we are trying to see how we complement them rather than how to change them. In genuinely honoring the sacred powers of men, they in turn will start to honor the divine powers of the feminine…well at least some of them will and they are the ones we want to work with.